A test

That's what this weekend will be - a test.

You see, I have a large family.  There are 7 of us living in an 1100 sq ft house.  There are officially 2 bedrooms, and we have 1 bathroom.
Between my divorced parents and their 2nd marriages, I have 6 sisters and 2 brothers.

Here is my secret - I am claustrophobic. Not only to small, closed in spaces, but to crowded areas as well.  Maybe it is because I am short, but I am not crazy about crowds.

2 of my sisters are here for a visit.  I am excited to have them here.  I am considerably older then they are and I haven't really spent too much time with them.  Oh but, I am trying hard to keep my head calm and to think straight and not to let myself get overwhelmed.  Because when I get overwhelmed, I shut down.

I don't want to be a bad hostess.  But it is really hard for me to let people hang out in my bubble for extended periods of time.  We don't have a lot of people over.

I am looking forward to cooking for them and having them help me bake cupcakes for Eric's party.  Lots of chatting and catching up.  But I am nervous.  So nervous that I am going to feel like I am suffocating.

I hope I pass my test.  Not that they are putting me to a test, but I am putting myself to a test.  I didn't study very well, so I hope it all goes well.

If you don't hear from me in several days, come check my closet.  I will be hiding in there with a large bottle of wine, rocking back and forth, and mumbling incoherently.